Saturday, December 4, 2010


Holidays!I finished orientation yesterday, and today is the first day of my summer holidays. Or, as it's now called "study break"... I have a tonne of holiday homework, so I'll probably end up studying a lot. Before I started orientation, though, I went stationery shopping! Here are the things I bought.

The only textbooks that were in stock: 'Stasiland',
'Aria', 'Emma' & notes for 'The Tempest'. All for Literature. =)

I got some star shaped paperclips &
a box of metallic coloured clips, too

Purple binder folder, notebook, plastic envelope and display book for Legal Studies

Matching binder folder & notebook with pink
plastic envelope and display book for Literature

I got a new pacer, fluorescent sticky tabs, write on sticky tabs,
a mini stapler as well as a mini pair of scissors.
Stationery and textbooks:
I colour code all my stationery. Green is for German, blue has always been for maths, and this year I chose pink for Literature and purple for Legal Studies. The rest of my textbooks should be in soon, I ordered them a fortnight ago, and I can't study properly until I have them all. In fact, I can't do anything for Legal Studies until I have the textbook.

I've started to read 'Emma', though. I really dislike Jane Austen, and I've tried to read 'Emma' three times in the past few years, but have never persevered. I did read all of 'Pride and Prejudice'. It took all of my willpower to finish it, and I've given myself motivation to finish 'Emma' this time: I'm not allowed to read any other books until I've read it! I'm dying to read 'Stasiland', because my detailed study on the DDR and post-war Germany from 2009 will really help, plus the book looks great... But I won't. Not until I finish 'Emma'. And it's killing me to have to delay starting Shakespeare, but it's what I need to do.

I've got nice teachers for my subjects, and they understand my illnesses. Hopefully there won't be too much homework, but if there is, they should let me do less. I work best when only the necessary tasks are compulsory, so there's less pressure on me. But that's not until next year! I'm part time at school, still, and my Literature class is really small; there's only 8 of us. Legal Studies is a bigger class, and I think I'm the only one who didn't do it in Year 11. It's not worrying me too much, though, as it's not very difficult. There's just quite a lot to memorise.

I feel a lot happier and more motivated now that I'm back at school. Every time I say to a doctor how ill I am, or how much pain I get after a full day of school, they suggest I drop out. I'll never drop out, ever. This is my reason to get up each day, and to keep pushing through the pain and exhaustion, and every doctor suggests I give it up. Well, I won't. I've lost too much already, and it's ridiculous to "listen to your body" when you're in my condition. If I did, I'd never get out of bed, and then my doctors would be even more annoyed! It's great to be at school again, though. My year level is really nice, and they've been so welcoming. I was even included in the KK, and the school captain ensured I got my circular about the Year 12 hoodie in time! Next year will be a really good year, even if I'm in pain and constantly exausted. It's my last year, and I'm determined to make the most of it.

We put up our Christmas tree on December 1st, as we do every year. I took a picture on my iPhone:

Our Christmas tree with all the decorations on!
We've got to get some more lights. One pack isn't enough.
I've never got what I truly want for Christmas: I want to be healthy. I want there to suddenly be a cure for all my spoonie friends, so no one ever has to suffer. I'll take the next best thing, though: an improvement in my health. I'd love that, especially if it helps me complete high school! I usually just get things to make my life a bit easier - an iTunes voucher so I can buy more music for days when I'm in bed, or DVDs to watch, or, when I was healthier, art supplies and sewing supplies. Things like that.

Small things make me really happy, though. Sometimes it's just being remembered, which sounds odd, but if you're part time at school, people often forget about you, so it's things like being included in a KK, girls inviting me to walk with them at lunch, or my extended family understanding my illnesses and actually asking how I am, visiting me in hospital, or calling me. (But that doesn't happen. People get tired of the chronically ill, but they never think that I'm sick of being sick!)

One thing I've taken from my experiences with people and my illnesses is that family won't always be there, so you need to build a support network of close friends, ones who'll always be there, no matter what. I'm working on that, but it's so hard to keep friends if you can't do what "normal" teenagers do!

Thanks for reading, and I hope I'll be able to post a bit more regularly over the holidays. My laptop has been completely reimaged and restored, so now it runs brilliantly... I've also got Windows 7 now! Leave a comment if you feel like it! =)


  1. Hi Alex,

    Just came across your blog. I live with fibro also so it's a great read. And your an aussie too! Love the shopping posts, I can totally relate to how a new purchace or a blog comment (I'm a blogger also) and simple things can bring so much joy when living with chronic pain. Good on you for keeping up with studying, I haven't been able to study since I finished year 12 and I understand how difficult it must be. I really admire people who study despite chronic pain. You are such an inspiration! Keep up the great work, you are doing a fantastic job!


  2. I so wish I could go shopping with you. You get the great notebooks and binders! Love them.

    You literature books are awesome. I have read all but one of them. That was my major and minor in college.

    I'm glad you are back in school and determined to finish. Take care of yourself while your doing it okay?

  3. "People get tired of the chronically ill, but they never think that I'm sick of being sick"

    That sums this whole thing up perfectly! congrats for pushing through and getting on with things - it can be so easy with this thing to just give up and mong sometimes.
    ..though i have to disagree on the Austen opinions - she's one of my fave authors *grin* and i love all the bbc adaptations of her stuff, watch 'em any chance i get!

  4. It's inspiring how you keep up with studies despite chronic pain.